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Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Hope it's not true, this one...

Ritu Bhanot — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 17:59:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Ritu Bhanot
Post title: Hope it's not true, this one...

[quote]Jenny Forbes wrote:

Another definition of Marriage:

An institution that gives you someone to share the troubles you wouldn't have had if you hadn't married him.

(or her, I suppose I should add!)

Regards,
Jenny. [/quote]

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Happy Easter William

Ritu Bhanot — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 17:58:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Ritu Bhanot
Post title: Happy Easter William

[quote]William [Bill] Gray wrote:

A committee
A group of people who keep minutes and waste hours!

Happy Easter,

Bill

[/quote]

I like this definition too :)

*It's true...

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Simple answer

Ritu Bhanot — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 17:15:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Ritu Bhanot
Post title: Simple answer

[quote]Hipyan Nopri wrote:

Hi Ritu,

Really refreshing. Apart from being jokes they also serve to mock the real cultural conditions. Your country is not so much different from mine.:)

P.S.: You look much slimmer than before. What is the secret? [/quote]

Elementary, my dear Hipyan ;-)

It's a photographer's trick.

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Smile

Özden Arıkan — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 16:03:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Özden Arıkan
Post title: Smile

Thanks, Ritu!

Several ones are truly great, but I loved the definition of smile:

[quote]Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.[/quote]

Now, got to catch an occasion to use it ;-)

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Really Refreshing

Hipyan Nopri — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 15:04:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Hipyan Nopri
Post title: Really Refreshing

[quote]Ritu Bhanot wrote:

Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the
Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds
of either"

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Father: A banker provided by nature.

Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got
caught.

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are
early.

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your
Confidence after.

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

[/quote]

Hi Ritu,

Really refreshing. Apart from being jokes they also serve to mock the real cultural conditions. Your country is not so much different from mine.:)

P.S.: You look much slimmer than before. What is the secret?

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Thanks, Ritu!

megane_wang — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 14:17:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: megane_wang
Post title: Thanks, Ritu!

Thanks for this piece of fun.

I love that "Conference Room" definition !!! :D

Ruth @ MW

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | another

Melzie — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 13:27:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Melzie
Post title: another

Thoses are great. here's one more

Banker: someone who lends you an umbrella when it's sunny and takes it back when it rains

[Edited at 2007-03-30 16:07]

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Glad you enjoyed it

Ritu Bhanot — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 13:10:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Ritu Bhanot
Post title: Glad you enjoyed it

[quote]Tina Colquhoun wrote:

Why is it the father who's the banker? In my experience, children fleece both parents!!!

Tina [/quote]

Well, I'm not the right person to ask ('coz I didn't find these definitions)... well, in countries like India usually father used to be the only earning member so... ;-)

In fact, I was thinking about the definition of Life Insurance... it is so true.

And I love Dictionary... :) (wish it was called life ;-))

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Agree...

William [Bill] Gray — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 12:30:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: William [Bill] Gray
Post title: Agree...

[quote]Tina Colquhoun wrote:

Why is it the father who's the banker? In my experience, children fleece both parents!!!

Tina [/quote]

And not only sons play!! :-)

School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

[Edited at 2007-03-30 12:31]

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Marriage

Jennifer Forbes — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 11:57:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Jennifer Forbes
Post title: Marriage

[quote]Cristina Popa wrote:

Thank you, Ritu!
I especially liked the definition of "marriage" and "dictionary" :). [/quote]

Another definition of Marriage:

An institution that gives you someone to share the troubles you wouldn't have had if you hadn't married him.

(or her, I suppose I should add!)

Regards,
Jenny.

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Erm...

Tina Colquhoun — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 11:54:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Tina Colquhoun
Post title: Erm...

Why is it the father who's the banker? In my experience, children fleece both parents!!!

Tina

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Thank you...

William [Bill] Gray — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 11:29:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: William [Bill] Gray
Post title: Thank you...

... Ritu, that was fun. And as Hester says, a pleasant diversion on a very busy Friday afternoon before Easter holiday week!

I liked the dictionary definition, since I work a lot with them, and strive for success in the midst of too much work!

I have another which was not on your list:

A committee
A group of people who keep minutes and waste hours!

Happy Easter,

Bill

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Interesting

Kaliamma Ponnan — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 11:27:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Kaliamma Ponnan
Post title: Interesting

Thanks Ritu. Truly interesting. Gave me a nice break from work.

My favorite was the definition on "experience" and "yawn."

KP

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Thank you!

Hester Eymers — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 11:07:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Hester Eymers
Post title: Thank you!

Nice distraction from a tedious job!

[quote]

Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead. [/quote]

I did study philosophy, but am glad I didn't become one...

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!! | Thanks!

Cristina Popescu (X) — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 10:17:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Cristina Popescu (X)
Post title: Thanks!

Thank you, Ritu!
I especially liked the definition of "marriage" and "dictionary" :).

Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!

Ritu Bhanot — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 07:40:00 +0000

Forum: Off topic
Topic: Basic definitions which we normally get wrong!!!!!
Poster: Ritu Bhanot

Just for fun...

Few Definitions

School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that
you can die Rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by
feminine waterpower.

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the
Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds
of either"

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody
believes he got the biggest piece.

Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Father: A banker provided by nature.

Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got
caught.

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are
early.

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your
Confidence after.

Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you
actually do.

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of
when dead.